Support network

Asking for help is a sign of strength.  It means that you’re secure enough to know when you need support to do something right.  A good manager will recognize this and embrace those people who have the confidence to seek support.

And then there are those insecure people, including possibly your boss, who will use information to take you down because they think taking you down brings them up.

First of all, they’re wrong.  Have compassion for these sad souls and know that when you look good, your boss looks amazing and the other way around.  Lead by example and maintain your integrity.

Nevertheless, it’s unpleasant to be on the other side of that insecure person.  So, much like you assess what communication style will work with each colleague, you also need to grow your radar for those insecure people who are untrustworthy.  Keep them close, so as not to make enemies, but don’t confide in them.  It’ll bite you in the you-know-what.

Trust your gut when building your support network.

Building a support network may not be a formal entity, but more like a list of people in your head who you know you can go to for certain guidance.  They can be in your department, in another department or outside the office.  Identify for yourself what you trust them to help you with- to vent, to advise, what kind of experience do they have, do they have good judgment in general- and keep this bank of support in your back pocket for when you need it.

They don’t need to know they’re part of a personal support group.  You know it and that can be comforting and enable you to handle tough situations.

If your organization has an official mentoring program, that’s great and highly unusual.  Please know that just because someone signed up to be a mentor doesn’t mean they’re trustworthy. It could be a life changing and wonderful mentoring relationship or a false one. Keep your radar on and trust your gut.